Quarantine and Me
So last month, on March 8th, my home was burglarized. That one incident quickly changed my whole life. Literally, my life changed in the blink of an eye.
In an instant, I no longer felt safe in my own home. It no longer felt like my safe place. It no longer felt like my place of peace and comfort. Instead, it felt like a place filled with violation, uncertainty, and filth. Not filth as in the house was dirty, but filth in the sense of someone who didn’t belong in here, had entered illegally and had their way. They touched whatever they wanted and also took whatever their heart(s) desired. So naturally, I couldn’t be here. I wasn’t staying there any longer than I had to. Like not a single second longer.
Following the break in, I went to my parents’ house. I stayed with my parents for two weeks. The last time I stayed with them for an extended period of time was when MomMom died. I had stayed there the two nights prior to her passing and that full week after. This year makes five years since she passed away, so needless to say, it’s been a while since I stayed with my parents for a lengthy time! During that time, I got to see them every day. My parents were excited to have me back under their roof, even if it was only temporary. I was glad to be there too, well only if I wasn’t alone, because I was actually very afraid of being in ANY house alone, not just my own. Plus I got dinner every day that I didn’t have to cook!😁😋I was no longer working after work every single day. I got to take a break from the hustle and bustle of life. Don’t get me wrong, that break wasn’t planned and I surely wouldn’t have taken it, had my world not just been shaken up, but I desperately needed it.
Time goes on, I slowly but surely come back home. The first few nights that I stayed, I refused to stay alone. Even though my new alarm system and cameras were already installed, it still wasn’t safe for me to be here. Physically it was. Mentally and emotionally it wasn’t, so yeah, that wasn’t happening! I wasn’t ok. I was constantly jumping from my own shadow. Every little noise scared me. Going home after dark wasn’t an option. My peace of mind and security had been completely shattered. Even with the negative things that I was experiencing, I was still in a space where I no longer wanted to be so “busy” all of the time. I was starting to appreciate not taking on so much.
A couple of weeks after the break in. The rona was now running rampant in the US. People were sick and dying. In an effort to slow the quickly spreading virus, some measures were put in place. Social distancing began (being at least 6 feet away from others). Gatherings were reduced to 250 or less, then 50 or less, and finally 10 or less. Restaurants and bars were closed. Nail and hair salons were closed. Retail stores were closed. That meant no church, no happy hours or brunches, no “me time” appointments, no running to the stores every five minutes, no gatherings. Many jobs went from having all of their employees in the office to most, if not all of them working from home. As time went on, we were quarantined. We were told to only leave for essential travel (of course some of y’all STILL AINT listening though 😒). Wearing masks/bandannas to stores started.
Literally in a matter of days, God put a stop to so much of what keeps us so ridiculously busy. We had to learn to be still and sit with ourselves. But for me, the mandatory stillness wasn’t a shock to my world. I had already been practicing that for a couple of weeks, due to my own situation. However, I was able to see that God does all things well and that His timing is always perfect. You see, had that break in not happened, I wouldn’t have spent those two weeks with my parents. Had I not done that, who knows when I would have been able to spend legitimate time with them like that. I wouldn’t have already significantly cut back on how much I was working so I would have had to suddenly shift to less income. Although the break in really sucked, it was preparing me for what was to come, it was providing me with the space to do what I really value, which is cultivating relationships. Not only did I get to spend more time with my parents, it also provided me with the space and opportunity to repair a relationship with someone who is very near and dear to my heart. I’ve been able to talk to loved ones more. So I’m actually quite grateful for all that’s happened recently.
Y’all! I know this Covid-19 pandemic isn’t exactly what we all wanted or planned on dealing with in 2020, but I encourage you to appreciate it. No I’m not saying that illness or death is a good thing, however, I am saying to do your best to find the blessing in this time. Appreciate the stillness. Appreciate your connections. Appreciate your health. Appreciate your finances. Appreciate your emotions, both negative and positive. Appreciate everything that you’ve been blessed with. Really take a second to relax and reconnect with your family and friends. We can’t go visit each other, but we surely can talk to each other. Don’t stress so much about work because let’s be real, they will never stress themselves over you! Put you first and be aware of your emotional and mental well being. Develop a closer relationship with God. At the end of the day, this really could have been another way but God is still keeping us through all of this.
❤️MrR❤️
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